If you have read my blogs in the past some maybe even most are me talking about mental health especially talking about depression.

I have talked about depression days and overall how depression sucks and I won’t stop saying it because depression does suck but today I wanted to rant or maybe just talk about another thing depression and anxiety do to me when they both hate me on the same day. 

Now usually when this happens I don’t notice it. It kinda just happens and I think to myself ok I’m depressed and I am going to overthink whatever topic until I realize it’s stupid to overthink about it. 

So about a week ago I was having a good morning. I woke up at a good time I had a good breakfast and the plan was to get stuff done and overall just have a good day. That sounds good, right? 

Well, I’m eating breakfast and I’m just thinking and minding my own business when a thought comes into my head and sadly for me it wasn’t a good thought it was a thought that would trigger my depression well my anxiety would trigger it and then my depression would come along and I remember thinking about it and I thought to myself “no no we ain’t doing this” because I knew in my head it was not worth the stress about something that didn’t really matter.

It seemed though that my depression was like “HEYY YOU MISS ME” and all of a sudden my depression came. All because of a simple thought a simple thought that didn’t really matter and should have been easily been erased in a sense but nope. So my oh it’s gonna be a good day to get stuff done turned into it’s gonna be a day to watch friends and not do anything for the whole day because I feel unmotivated. 

Now some of you reading this blog post may not have depression or haven’t gone through this and you probably wondering this can’t be really how do you get depressed that quickly…. 

Now I can admit and say I pushed it to the back of my brain to let it rot and unfortunately it slipped threw or I can admit that sometimes that is how depression works.

The switch in my brain my mood and even my energy. This thought ruined my day faster than the speed of light. LITERALLY. 

Although I have had depression for years and thoughts like that would ruin my day I never noticed my depression take over like that. 

It’s scary it’s terrifying. Knowing that sometimes your brain is weak that sometimes you can’t win a battle. Like I said your brain it’s the worst enemy. It’ll make you think about things that aren’t true or something that may be true but not something that should make you ruin your day.

To the people who don’t suffer with depression. The honest truth is that depression hurts, it’s exhausting, it destroys your brain and it overall is a pain in everyone’s ass.

To the people who have depression. Take care of yourself even if that means going to therapy. Depression just sucks and that’s the unfortunate truth.

As I say to my readers and the random people of the Internet.

Just keep swimming.