The Depression Checklist..
You know there is one thing for certain that when I was young I never thought my life would be filled with all these different checklists but I also didn’t know how depressing it can be to be an actual adult.
I have a ton of things that happen in my life that I need to sit down and figure out what is causing a problem like headaches because everything must give me a headache like having a weird sleep schedule, not enough water or the seasons wanting to change in a night and I will have the worst sinus headache then the amazing random migraine and that’s just headaches the lists of lists can go on like nausea and being grumpy.
But today we talk about depression because in this day in age its sucks and we have to figure out how to get unsuck even though that is not even a thing.
My depression began in middle school when the whole puberty thing starts hormones start going crazy and then you add really mean middle schools and well that equals to have really bad depression. When I was in middle school I never really knew it was a thing I just knew I was sad and lonely and my mind was in a dark place. But as high school came along I learned to figure it out and I realized there were certain things I needed to do to kinda give me that boost but even years later after graduating high school when I think I have it figured out the universe is quick to show me that I really don’t.
The cool thing about having depression and anxiety now is that social media is such a big thing now and people talk about their said problems and they talk about what they do and what helped them. Its always interesting to learn that other people have the same thoughts that you do or that their brain is just as messy as yours. I think one of the biggest things I learned is how sensitive our body is and you miss one thing and boom DEPRESSED.
There was this video of a guy and he was all happy and having a great time and he basically said “Twenty minutes ago I wanted to kill myself then I ate some chicken and I am happy and no longer wanting to die” that video actually sparked a girl to talk about that and the word being Halt.
H- Hunger
A- Anger
L- Lonely
T- Tired
Halt actually started to help people with addictions and then it was proved that it could actually help people with depression and anxiety.
Hence what I call the depression checklist.
I am a twenty-one-year-old who has yet to get a job and spends her life at home but. On weekdays I have some sort of schedule but on weekends I don’t which means that my eating habit is horrible. I remember one weekend when I had eaten breakfast at 12 ish and didn’t really have any snacks until dinner which was at six and I remember just being kinda in a bleh state. I was sad and I didn’t really wanna do anything and so I kinda just scroll on my phone with the odd watching of some sort of show. Then by the time I had dinner and ate food that I didn’t know I was really hungry for all of sudden my depression kinda just lifted and I was motivated I was happy and I just wanted to have a good rest of the day.
It kinda reminds me of the commercial that I actually never see anymore and it’s someone whos having a really bad day then it goes “Your not you when your hungry eat a Snickers”.
There have been other instances in which I would wake up in the middle of the night and be up for an hour which would result in me having an amazing time overthinking. When I would wake up I would kinda just laugh at myself because I was truly so tired that I didn’t need to be thinking about my life choices at 4am in the morning.
Then you have anger in which I do fully get into a mood and with a bad mood could only make the already sad thoughts into a more troubling ones. Then you have loneliness in which I don’t fully get all the time since I’m an only child and well been alone a lot of my life but when I do man do those thoughts get wild.
(I totally did halt out of order and ended up with HLAT.
Besides the word Halt and it actually making me think about life my depression has also been cured with a Coke and cheesecake. I must admit 2 things I didn’t drink and eat those at the same time it was one after another and second yeah it’s a weird combo. This also tells me that there is a big chance in life that I am having way too much sugar and maybe should start cutting back a little and not eating the most unhealthy things in life.
But going back to the very beginning our body is so very sensitive and when it comes to my depression it’s almost like I learn something new about it each day. From the foods that I eat to the horrible sleep schedule that forever haunts me with being exhausted each day and my brain thinking very dumb things that are not important.
Of course, there are many things with depression and its causes and it won’t be any of the of the things on the list. The mind is a very confusing place and I will simply not be the one to figure or clean the mess up.
But to recap here is the wonderful checklist
1 Hunger – When depressed question the last time you ate and if you need a snack and well eattt
2 Anger- Figure out what the hell has you so pissed at 4 pm on a Monday and with that listen to music or go for a walk or watch a show or as I do rant to your best friend while they possibly are totally not even listening
3 Lonely – ah the mind’s most favourite thing. As I do call your best friend or annoy of your family members with facts about star wars that you recently learned. If not go for a walk and get some fresh air or do some shopping you been holding off on doing.
4 Tired – When we are tired we lose most of our brain cells and we simply have no time to fight some stupid ass thoughts while we try to stay awake. Go take a nap or a long eight-hour sleep.
As much as depression is an exhausting and confusing thing sometimes a simple cure is checking in with yourself and taking care of yourself.
