Writing a book sounds easy but at the same time it sounds difficult and complex and well overall why did I even think about writing a book. 

Writing a book comes with multiple different feelings and thoughts. I’ve talked about being a writer with imposter syndrome and how some days can be terrible because all I think is how bad my writing is and how I will never make it as a writer as dark as that sounds, I’ve also talked about writer’s block and how sometimes your brain won’t think anything and it’s literally like talking to a wall but that does remind me that I should write a new writer’s block post sooner or later. 

Writing is something you’ll learn and get better at over time and there will never be a day where you are perfect at writing because it’s one of those things you kinda keep learning and getting better at and sometimes the stories that you thought were amazing are kinda crappy. Like now I go back and read some of the short stories I wrote back in high school and I remember being so proud of them and thinking holy this is the best I have ever written and now when I read them I cringe and all that I can really say is “The fuck”. Some of the sentences don’t make sense and overall the proud oh my this is so good is an oh my this is so bad I mean so bad. 

As of right now, I am writing another story now this story I do have plans for because if I don’t make plans then nothing happens and I will never and I mean never get it done so I have to give myself these deadlines in order to do stuff and goals and all that fun stuff. The first draft of this story was great it was a little short story it was cute and funny and relatable but then I decided that it was all too much for a short story so I would move it up to a normal length YA book and I wrote a first full draft or second draft which was great and then I moved onto the second or third draft and it seems I stare at the page. 

What is confusing and sometimes not talked about or maybe it is and I’m not finding the answers but it’s the fact that I am not even in the middle of the third draft and I have realized that maybe just maybe this story is not as good as I thought it was. I can’t ask my friends or my family who I loved so much and I respect and hear what they say but love can blur the truth like the hard truth whether a story is good or not. 

All of a sudden you are working so hard on something and then you realize all that hard work may have really been wasted and that maybe it wasn’t even worth it. 

Again all of this sounds dark and not that good but that’s writing its just so much doubt and worry that something is just that bad. As I said I’m not even halfway through this third draft and I have no idea if I should continue or I should stop and move on to something else.

But with every problem and self-doubt, there is always some sort of advice. So to other writers also having this problem here are some I have found. 

1. Keep writing it. Finish the damn thing. Just get it done that is what matters 
2. Writing can always be edited and fixed and made better 
3. No matter if it’s your best work your brain will tell you otherwise 

Writing is a pain and it sucks but the end result after editing and editing and well more editing and deleting and rewriting and more editing and deleting and then the end result are worth it. Just have to finish the first hundred drafts.