If you read my blog I talk a lot about writing obviously and usually, I complain about it. If you’re new you’ll hear a lot about me complaining about it. I have no idea where this post will take me but as the cheesy line goes hope in and enjoy the ride… 

The one thing about my mom is that she tends to keep a lot of my notebooks from when I was a kid and by keep I mean she ends up finding them and I promise her I will bring them to my room to keep but end up forgetting so she ends up with them. But when I finally grab ahold of the notes from school and just a general notebook the pages are often filled with work but if they’re not they would be filled with stories I can’t say how much writing stories I did when I was a kid but I have found a few whatever that number be maybe a large few or a small few. 

Those stories are interesting to read, to say the least. Some are about me and my friends hanging out and playing with dolls (Literally) some are about me as the main character doing something so very fun. Reading them now they are horrible. First, they don’t even have a plot, hell it’s the beginning and some sort of end. The spelling is horrible and I mean awful. I seriously didn’t know how to spell as a kid and it was more funny because I understood it and knew where my mind was at that time. Kinda. 

I have said this in many posts before but I wrote stories growing up, especially in middle school and high school where I would end up finishing my very first novel that is still horrible. It was weird because for the longest time, my dream job kept changing, one day it was to be a vet the next to be a photographer the next to be a physiologist and then I woke up and thought hey I should be a writer and then from there the ideas sprout and I wanted to be a screenwriter/ director. 

But some days I sit down and think to myself why the hell did I choose to be a writer? Why couldn’t I choose some easy dream job or just something that wasn’t that big? Then a few days ago I was watching an interview about my favourite metal artist and he was just talking and just answering and the question came up about him being a singer and him travelling around the world and his answer from what I remember was ever since he was a kid he knew he wanted to be someone who would entertain. So a singer as he is or maybe an actor or a comedian etc whatever else there is to entertain that was his goal.

Then I took in all the weird stuff I did as a kid relating to him and remembered a conversation I had with my therapist. I was telling her how my dream jobs changed and how it took me so long to finally figure out what I wanted to be and I remember she said something along the lines of “Well it seems you always wanted to make people feel better every single of your dream jobs would make someone’s day and make em feel good” 

As a vet I would be taking care of animals duh making sure they were ok although I don’t think they can read books but anyways 

A photographer taking photos of babies and mothers-to-be – making their day making a memory

A psychologist- Helping others figure out how to deal with their brain and well making them feel ok. 

A writer/ Director- Wanting to make something that people can escape this horrible boring world and make them feel better. 

The best thing about being a writer is you don’t have to speak well like an actor. As a writer, you don’t have to be brave and say all the things you want to say. You don’t have to worry about having a stutter or hating your voice or talking over your words because your brain is working faster than your lips can move. As much as I can be confident and brave my mind is loud with a lot of things that can’t just say I can’t be as confident as I do writing. With writing that all is thrown out the window. Everything I want to say is said without having to hate my voice or speaking too fast or speaking over words or even having to look someone in the eyes to speak I just write staring at a white screen filled with words. I can hide behind the sheet of paper or behind the camera. Almost like having another identity you take on social media. No one knows who you are well who you really are and so you can just make a whole new person that is completely different then what you are 

I guess I would say that’s my favourite thing about being a writer.